Mountain View Getaway: Unbeatable Deals at Holiday Inn Express!
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving deep into the Mountain View Getaway… which, let's be real, sounds a little generic. But hey, it's a Holiday Inn Express! And trust me, I've stayed in enough Holiday Inn Expresses to feel qualified to judge. This review is going to be a rollercoaster, so hold on tight!
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First things first, accessibility. Ugh, the bane of my existence and a constant worry when traveling with… well, anyone who isn't a gazelle. Holiday Inn Expresses, in my experience, are usually pretty good. Let's see if this one lives up to the standard.
Accessibility: The website says they have facilities for disabled guests. Okay, that's vague. We'll have to dig deeper later. Elevators? Gotta have 'em. Accessible rooms with wheelchair access? Crucial. Stay tuned, people, stay tuned. I hate when hotels say they're accessible and then offer a ramp steeper than the Matterhorn.
On-Site Accessible Restaurants/Lounges: Now, this is where things can get dicey. A "restaurant" doesn't necessarily mean accessible seating, folks. We're looking for wide aisles, tables that actually accommodate wheelchairs, and menus that aren't a mile long (it's exhausting to read when you're already juggling a cane and a drink).
Internet Access: The Holy Grail of Modern Travel
Okay, let's be real. Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! is a godsend. Absolutely crucial. My phone is basically a direct link to the chaos of my life, and I need to stay connected. Especially when I'm supposed to be relaxing. They also offer Internet [LAN] – for those of you who are dinosaurs and still use Ethernet cables, I'm guessing. Internet services are a must. And Wi-Fi in public areas, again, essential. I mean, I probably won't be chilling in the lobby, but if I am, I need my cat videos, dammit!
Things to Do & Ways to Relax: The Pursuit of Pampering (or at least, pretending to be pampered)
Alright, let's see if this place is even remotely zen.
Fitness Center: Okay, okay. I should use this. But let's be honest. I probably won't unless they have a treadmill with a killer view.
Pool with View: YES PLEASE! I'm a sucker for a pool view. Tell me it exists and give me pictures…
Sauna/Spa/Steamroom: I'm intrigued. Always a plus, even if I end up just sitting there, awkwardly sweating and pretending I know what I'm doing. They have to be exceptionally clean though. No one wants to catch a weird fungus.
Swimming pool & Swimming pool [outdoor]: Two pools? Okay, now we're talking! One's gotta be kid-friendly, likely a chaotic splash zone. I might need an extra strong margarita to deal with that.
Massage, Body scrub and Body wrap: I'm a sucker for all of these. I'm picturing it now… a massage, some soft music. This place just might have me at "hello".
Cleanliness and Safety: The Existential Dread of Germs (especially post-COVID)
This is HUGE. I'm borderline germaphobe, and the pandemic amplified that tenfold.
- Anti-viral cleaning products: Good start.
- Daily disinfection in common areas: Essential.
- Hand sanitizer: Bless you, Holiday Inn Express.
- Hygiene certification: Pray for this.
- Individually-wrapped food options: Yes, please. I do not want to be sharing tongs with a stranger.
- Physical distancing of at least 1 meter: Please enforce this.
- Professional-grade sanitizing services: Show me the proof!
- Room sanitization opt-out available: I am 100% opting out. I'm neurotic, not stupid.
- Rooms sanitized between stays: My brain is calming just a little.
- Safe dining setup: This is what really keeps me up at night…
- Sanitized kitchen and tableware items: This is a must.
- Staff trained in safety protocol: Essential. Please, please, please!
- Sterilizing equipment: Okay, now we're getting serious.
- Smoke alarms, CCTV in common areas, CCTV outside property, Fire extinguisher, Front desk [24-hour], Security [24-hour], Soundproof rooms: This is all what I expect from a hotel in this day and age.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: Fueling the Existential Crisis (or just trying to eat a decent meal)
Okay, now we get to the good stuff, the sustenance.
- Breakfast [buffet]: the holy grail! Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Asian breakfast, Western breakfast… I'm in. I will eat all the carbs. And maybe some fruit.
- A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian cuisine in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant,Western cuisine in restaurant, Good to have options!
- Bar, Coffee shop, Poolside bar, Snack bar: Perfect for pre-pool cocktails, post-pool relaxation, all-day snacks.
- Restaurants: How many? How good? Detail, Holiday Inn Express! Detail!
- Room service [24-hour]: YES! A lifesaver. In the middle of the night when I need… snacks.
- Desserts in restaurant, Soup in restaurant, Salad in restaurant, Okay, this is great but I'm not really here for salad.
- Bottle of water and coffee/tea in restaurant: Absolutely necessary.
Services and Conveniences: The Little Things That Can Make or Break a Stay
- Air conditioning in public area: Essential, especially in the warmer months. No one wants to sweat through their welcome.
- Business facilities: Important if you're traveling for work, even if I am not.
- Daily housekeeping: Praise be! Someone else can make the bed (and, you know, clean the bathroom).
- Doorman: Nice touch. Helps with the luggage, the bags, the kids.
- Elevator: (See Accessibility, above).
- Food delivery: Essential for those nights you just want to stay in your pajamas and order Chinese.
- Gift/souvenir shop: Good for picking up that last-minute gift… for yourself.
- Ironing service: A lifesaver. I'm terrible at ironing.
- Laundry service: Saves me from having to pack a suitcase full of clothes.
- Luggage storage, and Safe deposit boxes are essential.
- Concierge is a godsend for advice and information.
- Air conditioning, alarm clock, bathrobes, bathroom phone, bathtub, blackout curtains, carpeting, closet, coffee/tea maker, complimentary tea, desk, hair dryer, high floor, in-room safe box, internet access – lan, internet access – wireless, ironing facilities, laptop workspace, linens, mini bar, mirror, non-smoking, private bathroom, reading light, refrigerator, satellite/cable channels, scale, seating area, separate shower/bathtub, shower, slippers, smoke detector, socket near the bed, sofa, soundproofing, telephone, toiletries, towels, umbrella, visual alarm, wake-up service, wi-fi [free], window that opens
For the Kids: The Parent's Sanctuary (or the source of unending chaos)
- Babysitting service: If you're traveling with kids… pray you have this.
- Family/child friendly: Absolutely necessary!
- Kids facilities, Kids meal: Makes life so much easier.
Getting Around:
- Airport transfer: YES! Tired traveler's best friend.
- Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Car power charging station, Taxi service, Valet parking
Available in All Rooms: The Comfort Factor
- Additional toilet, air conditioning, alarm clock, bathrobes, bathroom phone, bathtub, blackout curtains, carpeting, closet, coffee/tea maker, complimentary tea, daily housekeeping, desk, extra long bed, free bottled water, hair dryer, high floor, in-room safe box, interconnecting room(s) available, internet access – Lan, internet access – wireless, ironing facilities, laptop workspace, linens, mini bar, mirror, non-smoking, on-demand movies, private bathroom, reading light, refrigerator, safety/security feature, satellite/cable channels, scale, seating area, separate shower/bathtub, shower, slippers, smoke detector, socket near the bed, sofa, soundproofing, telephone, toiletries, towels, umbrella, visual alarm, wake-up service, wi-fi [free], window that opens.
- I'm going to need a really comfortable bed and
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because this ain't your grandma's meticulously planned travel itinerary. This is me, about to unleash a week of potential disaster (and hopefully, a few moments of pure, unadulterated joy) in Silicon Valley, all starting at the… wait for it… Holiday Inn Express & Suites Mountain View! Yeah, glam, I know. Let's do this.
Day 1: Arrival & That Initial "Oh, My God, It's Silicon Valley" Shock
- Morning (Maybe… It Depends on the Flight): Arrive at SFO. Pray the luggage makes it. Seriously, I've got a phobia post-lost-luggage-in-Rome-2018. Grab a Lyft (fingers crossed for a chatty driver! I love a good human anecdote). The ride to Mountain View will be a blur of highway and… well, highway. Expect a sudden wave of existential dread as you realize you're surrounded by the future of everything.
- Afternoon (The Great Hotel Debacle): Check into the Holiday Inn Express. Okay, let's be real, it's not the Four Seasons. But the free breakfast better be decent, because I'm on a budget and hangry is a monster. Important note: Try to get a room away from the elevator. Always. That incessant ding is a personal hell-trigger. Unpack. Briefly contemplate the meaning of life while staring at the perfectly generic hotel art.
- Evening: First Bites & the Algorithm Whisper: Venture out. Maybe a quick, cheap dinner in a nearby… gasp … shopping center. Probably something familiar. Don't judge me. I'm still getting my bearings. Then, a walk. A slow, bewildered stroll. I swear, I could feel the algorithms humming around me. The air is thick with innovation, or maybe just the scent of overpriced kombucha. Okay, I'm getting a little overwhelmed. Bed. Early. Pre-dawn.
Day 2: Google's Playground (and My Tiny Breakdown)
- Morning (The Breakfast Gauntlet): Free breakfast. Survive the scramble for the last waffle. Judge everyone else’s breakfast choices. Savor the small victory of getting coffee. Consider whether the little packets of hot chocolate are actually good.
- Late Morning (Googleplex Panic!): Okay, this is happening. I’ve secured a visit to the Googleplex. My inner child is squealing. My inner cynic is bracing for corporate propaganda. The sheer scale of the place hits you like a… well, a Google-sized brick. I’m hoping for a photo with a T-Rex and maybe some inspirational quotes about disruption. I might also be secretly plotting to steal a Google bike. Don't judge. Every time I visit Google, I'm disappointed, and every time I get excited again. It’s such a mess.
- Afternoon (The Unplanned Lunch Debacle): The Googleplex is an absolute beast. I’m starving. Where to eat? Uh… The cafeteria turns out to be even MORE overwhelming than I thought. Everything is free! I'm a total fraud, I can't choose anything! So I pick up a sandwich and a cookie and run away.
- Evening (The Tech Museum Meltdown): Tech Museum of Innovation. Expect to be both awestruck and slightly terrified. Science is cool, but can I, a semi-educated human, actually understand this stuff? The answer is probably no. But hey, at least I can touch things. I will absolutely try to get hands-on with all the gadgets, even if I break something. I will then spend the rest of the evening trying to glue it back together.
Day 3: Venture Capital, and My Inability to Understand It
- Morning (The Coffee Crisis): The hotel coffee is… well, it's coffee. I need a real caffeine infusion. Find a local coffee shop. Pray for good Wi-Fi. Then, spend an hour pretending to be productive while actually staring at my phone.
- Mid-Morning (The Venture Capital Abyss): Try to attend a "networking" event. I have no idea what venture capital even is, but everyone here seems to. I will smile and nod and try to glean some knowledge by osmosis. Expect lots of buzzwords and a healthy dose of imposter syndrome.
- Afternoon (The Silicon Valley History Lesson): Visit a museum related to the history of Silicon Valley. I need to understand how all this tech got here. The history of the area, from orchards to chips, is really something. I will probably be more interested in the stories of the individuals involved than the actual tech.
- Evening (The After-Networking Crash): Retreat to the hotel room. Decompress. Consume copious amounts of snacks. Mentally prepare for another day of tech overload. Watch something mindless on TV. Or maybe just stare at the ceiling and contemplate the absurdity of it all.
Day 4: The Stanford Pilgrimage & Food Coma
- Morning (The Stanford Experience): Visit Stanford University. Ooh, the architecture! It's like a movie set. Walk around, feel inadequate, and take pictures of the buildings. Even just the simple beauty of the campus is worth the trip.
- Afternoon (The Food Coma): Okay, time for a food tour of some kind! I'm thinking a taco truck crawl. If that fails, then In-N-Out burger. I'm getting hungry just thinking about it, and I can't wait to go home and eat some home-cooked whatever.
- Evening (The Hotel Hangover): More generic hotel food. Consider ordering a pizza from a delivery service. Watch a terrible movie. Wonder if the world is run by robots yet.
- The Big Question: Will I finally find a place that sells good pie?!
- Side Quest: Learn something new at a museum or lecture.
Day 5: The Apple Experience and My Technological Humility
- Morning (Apple Park Pilgrimage): Drive by Apple Park. Take photos (from a safe distance, of course. I'm not trying to get arrested). Marvel at the "spaceship" – is it beautiful or terrifying? I haven't decided yet.
- Afternoon (The Apple Store Ordeal): Visit an Apple Store. Feel overwhelmed by the sheer sleekness. Touch all the shiny things. Ask a lot of dumb questions and try to act like I know what I'm talking about.
- Evening (The Reflective Stroll): Take a walk. Think about how technology has changed – and continues to change – everything. Feel a mixture of awe and slight existential dread.
Day 6: Last Day & the Emotional Baggage of Productivity
- Morning (The Productivity Pressure Cooker): Try to squeeze in something "productive." Write a blog post. Respond to emails. Attempt to "network" one more time. Feel the pressure of the Silicon Valley hustle.
- Afternoon (The Souvenir Scramble): Buy souvenirs. Try to find something quirky and memorable (good luck). Panic.
- Evening (The Farewell Feast of Fear): One last meal. Try to find a restaurant that isn't too pretentious. Reflect on the week. Feel vaguely sad that it's ending, and also relieved.
- Final Thoughts: I’m going to miss this place, and never ever want to come back. This place is both amazing and terrible.
Day 7: The Departure…Hopefully Not With a Broken Suitcase
- Morning (The Breakfast Redemption): One last attempt at the hotel breakfast. Try to snag a waffle. Coffee, please!
- The Departure: Get to the airport. Pray everything goes smoothly. Maybe one more frantic text to a friend about how weird Silicon Valley is.
- Last hope: The luggage makes it back.
So, that's the plan. Or at least, that's the vaguely-formed-idea-of-a-plan. I'm sure it will all go sideways. But hey, isn't that the fun of it? Wish me luck. I'll need it. I'm out!
Route 66 Getaway: Tulsa's BEST Western Escape!
Mountain View Getaway: Holiday Inn Express – Seriously, Is It Worth It? (An FAQ... Kinda)
Okay, seriously, is the Holiday Inn Express in Mountain View *really* that good? I see those "Unbeatable Deals"... are they lying to me?
Alright, let's get this straight. "Unbeatable Deals"? Hmmm... it's a Holiday Inn Express, not the Ritz-Carlton, okay? (Though, I *did* once dream I woke up in the Ritz, but that's a different therapy session). The deals? *Sometimes* good. Sometimes you'll find a steal, right? Especially if you're booking last minute or during the off-season. I've snagged rooms for like, 80 bucks! (And felt like I'd won the lottery that day). But other times? Yeah, it's just... the regular price. You know? So, check the sites. Comparison shop. Don't go in expecting to sell your organs for the room, but don't expect a free diamond either. Honestly, it depends on your expectations. If you need a clean, functional room with a decent free breakfast near Mountain View, it's a solid option. If you're expecting a spa, butler service, and a private chef, you're in the wrong place, pal. My advice? Check those deals... then pray to the Travel Gods.
What's the actual *room* like? I'm a bit of a clean freak.
Okay, I'm not a total germaphobe... *but*... I'm not thrilled by questionable cleanliness. The rooms? Generally, they're fine. Clean enough. My *biggest* thing? The bathroom. Always check the grout. Always. I have, on *one* occasion (and I'm still shuddering thinking about it), seen *something*… *questionable*… in the corner of the shower. Let's just say it made me question my life choices, my sanity, and the very concept of indoor plumbing. Okay, okay, it *was* a while ago, and I'm sure they've improved… I hope. Anyway, *mostly* clean. Don't expect gleaming marble and fluffy towels. Expect something you can sleep in without immediately needing a full-body scrub. Bring your own disinfectant wipes, just in case. You know, for peace of mind! And maybe a hazmat suit. (Just kidding... mostly.)
Let's talk about the breakfast. Is it the usual "cardboard eggs and sad muffins" situation?
Ugh. Breakfast. The make-or-break of any budget hotel, isn't it? The Holiday Inn Express breakfast... is... well, it's *breakfast*. Don't expect Michelin star dining. The eggs? Sometimes, they resemble something approaching real eggs. Sometimes, they're... *questionable spheres of… sustenance*. The muffins? They have a certain... *structural integrity*. Like, you could probably use one to build a very small, very sad brick wall. The coffee? It's coffee. It'll wake you up. My personal strategy? Go for the fruit. It's usually safe. And they *often* (crosses fingers) have those little yogurt parfaits, which are actually pretty decent. But if you're a breakfast snob? Bring your own granola and almond milk. Or just hit up a diner. You know? Because life's too short for subpar breakfast.
What about the location? Is it actually *near* anything interesting in Mountain View?
Okay, location, location, location. This is where the Holiday Inn Express in Mountain View actually *shines*. It's generally pretty good. Pretty darn good, actually. You're close to... stuff. Like, Google headquarters, which is always fun for people-watching. You're within driving distance of great restaurants, bars, and the heart of Mountain View, which is surprisingly… vibrant. Now, I had *one* time, though, during a particularly stressful work trip, where I *swore* my room was next to the freeway. The noise… oh god, the noise. It was like living *inside* a race car. I ended up sleeping in the bathtub. (Don't judge. Necessity is the mother of invention... and desperation). But *generally* (knock on wood), the location is a winner. Just… maybe ask for a room away from the highway. Pro-tip: bring earplugs. Seriously.
Do they have a pool? Because I *need* a pool. I mean, who doesn't?
Yes! They *usually* (though I haven't been recently, so double-check!) have a pool. And a gym. Which, let's be honest, I've probably used, like, twice in my life. The pool? It's… a pool. Not the Olympic-sized dream you might envision. It's… functional. Clean-ish. I've seen kids splashing. I've seen people doing laps (impressive!). I've mostly seen people lounging and complaining about the water being too cold. The gym? Okay, I need to confess something. The gym, in *one specific* memory, was... memorable. The treadmill. I swear, I put it on a slow, gentle walk, and then... *WHAM!*... it went into hyperdrive. I nearly flew off the back! It was like a rodeo! I grabbed the handles for dear life, and just... watched the scenery blur. I was bright red, laughing, a bit terrified... it was the highlight of my trip. So yeah, the pool and gym exist. They fulfill their purpose. Just… keep an eye on that treadmill. And maybe bring a life preserver just in case? Okay, I'm exaggerating, but be careful!
Parking? Is parking a nightmare?
Parking in Mountain View? In general, it's not the worst. The Holiday Inn Express? Usually, they have enough parking. Is it *convenient*? Maybe. Sometimes you might have to park a little further away, especially if you arrive late. But, I've never been entirely stranded. So, it's fine. Don't arrive at midnight expecting a spot right outside your door. But you should be alright. Just… be patient. And maybe practice your parallel parking, just in case. You never know!
Okay, so what's the *worst* bit about staying there? Be honest!
Honestly? The worst bit? The *elevator*. That elevator is a character. It's slow. It's small. It has a personality of its own. Sometimes it creaks and groans like an old sea captain. Sometimes it stops between floors for an unnecessarily long amount of time. Sometimes it... well, it does things that make you question its safety. I've had moments of genuine fear in that elevator! It's not *always* bad. But it's… a gamble. MyComfort Zone Inn
