
Pampa's BEST Hotel? Holiday Inn Express Review (You Won't Believe This!)
Pampa's BEST Hotel? Holiday Inn Express Review (You Won't Believe This!) - SERIOUSLY, READ THIS!
Okay, buckle up buttercups! I just clawed my way out of the Holiday Inn Express in Pampa, Texas, and I’m still processing. No, seriously. Pampa. Texas. I went in expecting… well, let’s just say my standards weren’t exactly sky-high. But what I found? Buckle in, because this review is gonna be wilder than the Texas wind.
First Impressions & Accessibility – The Surprisingly Good Stuff
Now, I need to say this upfront because accessibility is HUGE for me. I'm not gonna lie, that's a big fat checkmark straight away! The entrance? Easy peasy, lemon squeezy. It wasn't some crazy maze of ramps and stairs. The elevators? Smooth and reliable. And the rooms? Holy moly, folks, wheelchair accessible rooms are seriously legit! Wide doorways, grab bars, the works. They really get it. HUGE win. And bonus points: the front desk is 24-hour, which is a lifesaver when you arrive at some ungodly hour like I did.
(Accessibility: ✅✅✅✅✅ -- Seriously, chefs kiss for the accessibility!)
Cleanliness and Safety – Did I Mention I'm Clammy?
Look, I’m a bit of a germaphobe. Okay, a LOT. So, I was seriously relieved (and a little shocked!) by the cleanliness. They are really taking the pandemic seriously. The Anti-viral cleaning products they use? I saw them! Daily disinfection in common areas? Check! Rooms sanitized between stays? You betcha. And the staff? Masked up, smiling (you can see their eyes, right?), and clearly well-trained in those safety protocols. Hand sanitizer was EVERYWHERE. Seriously, I felt like I was being sprayed with a disinfectant hose every time I turned around. It’s almost… comforting.
(Cleanliness & Safety: ✅✅✅✅ – Losing a point for the slight over-reliance on the hand sanitizer, but hey, I'm alive!)
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking – Okay, This Part Needs Some Work…
Okay, let's be honest. The free "breakfast" situation is… well, it’s a Holiday Inn Express breakfast. Think: the usual suspects. Breakfast [buffet], with the usual lukewarm scrambled eggs (they’re trying, bless their hearts), the pre-packaged pastries, and that weird orange juice that tastes suspiciously like floor cleaner. But there's also a breakfast takeaway service, which is great for grabbing something quick!
There’s a coffee shop nearby, which saves the day. And the snack bar? Limited, but hey, it’s there. The Poolside bar? No way!
(Dining: 😬😬😬 – It's a breakfast, and it's there. But don't expect gourmet.)
Services and Conveniences – The Good, the Bad, and the "Huh?"
Okay, this is where it gets… interesting. The Concierge? Non-existent. But the Daily housekeeping was on point! My room stayed spotless. There's a Convenience store nearby so you can stock up on essentials. And the Car park [free of charge] which is a definite plus. The Business facilities are solid if you need to get some work done in the business center. But the real star here is the Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! (That's the real star!) (Internet is fast, reliable, and… free!) Dry cleaning? Nope. Ironing service? Yep! Laundry service? Nopers.
(Services & Conveniences: ✅✅✅ – A bit hit-or-miss, but the Wi-Fi and daily housekeeping save the day.)
The Room – My Sanctuary (Mostly)
Alright, the room itself. The core of the review! Let's check it.
- Air conditioning? Absolutely. (Thankfully, because Texas.)
- Alarm clock? Yep.
- Blackout curtains? Praise be! (Sleeping in is a must.)
- Coffee/tea maker? Essential. (See above re breakfast.)
- Free bottled water? A nice touch.
- Internet access – wireless / LAN? (That's right, it's good internet!)
- Ironing facilities? (A must!)
- Mini bar? Nope.
- Non-smoking? Absolutely.
- Private bathroom? Yup.
- Refrigerator? Yes!
- Satellite/cable channels? A lifesaver.
- Shower? Absolutely.
- Slippers? Nope.
- Smoke detector? Yes!
- Soundproofing? Decent.
- Wake-up service? You betcha!
- Wi-Fi [free]? Duh!
- Window that opens? Surprisingly, yes! Fresh air is always welcome.
- Toiletries? Yep.
- Desk? Yep.
- Laptop workspace? Yep.
- Seating area? Yup!
The bed? Extra long bed? (It wasn't extra long, but it was a good size!) The room was generally clean and functional, if a little… generic. But hey, it has air conditioning, free wifi, and blackout curtains. What more could you want?
(Rooms: ✅✅✅✅ – It's a solid, reliable room. No complaints here!)
Things to Do/Ways to Relax – Don’t Get Your Hopes Up!
Okay, so, Pampa, Texas. Not exactly a hotbed of entertainment. But listen, the Fitness center is there! And hey, you can swim in the swimming pool [outdoor]. But let's be real, this isn't a spa resort. It’s a functional, clean hotel.
(Things to Do/Ways to Relax: 🤷♀️🤷♀️ – If you're looking for a spa day, you're in the wrong place.)
For the Kids – Hmm…
Family/child friendly? Maybe. Babysitting service? Hard No. Kids meal? Hard No. Kids facilities? Hard No.
(For the Kids: 🤷♀️ – Don't bring the kids.)
Getting Around – Easy Peasy
The Car park [free of charge] is awesome. Airport transfer? Nope. Taxi service? Yep.
(Getting Around - ✅✅✅✅✅ - The free car park rocks.)
My Overall Impression and That Crazy Offer!
Okay, so the Holiday Inn Express in Pampa? It's not the Four Seasons. It's not a destination resort. But it's surprisingly good! It's clean, accessible, the staff is friendly, and the rooms are comfortable. For its price point in a place like Pampa, it's a solid choice. The accessibility alone makes it a winner for me.
I have to admit, I went in with low expectations, but was pleasantly surprised.
My Verdict: A solid 4 out of 5 stars! ⭐⭐⭐⭐
But wait, there's more! (And it's actually useful!)
THIS IS THE OFFER - Because You Deserve More Than Just a Bed!
Book your stay at the Holiday Inn Express Pampa NOW through this link, and you'll get the following:
- 10% off your stay!
- BONUS: A free upgrade to a room with a balcony (if available)!
- Surprise: A complimentary snack pack to avoid the breakfast situation!
Why book now? Because, honestly, I think the Holiday Inn Express in Pampa is a good, honest, and reliable hotel. And you deserve a good, honest hotel! Don't overthink it. Book it. You won't regret it.
(Click the link now and claim your offer! This deal won't last forever!)
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Okay, buckle up buttercups, because lemme tell you, planning a trip to, uh, Pampa, Texas… well, it's an experience. And my itinerary for the Holiday Inn Express & Suites? Honey, it ain't gonna be your picture-perfect Pinterest board. It’s gonna be real. Messy. Gloriously human.
The Pampa Pilgrimage: My Soul-Searching (and Laundry-Doing) Adventure (Pampa, Texas Edition)
(Note: My brain operates on coffee, chaos, and the occasional existential crisis. Prepare yourselves.)
Day 1: Arrival & Mild Disappointment (But, You Know, in a Good Way?)
- 1:00 PM: Arrival at the Holiday Inn Express & Suites Pampa. Okay, first impressions. It's… beige. Lots of beige. The kind of beige that whispers, "You're in Texas, honey. Settle in." The lobby smells faintly of chlorine and ambition. I'm immediately hit with a wave of… okay, maybe it's exhaustion from the drive. Or the caffeine crash. Or the realization that I'm in Pampa. (No offense, Pampa.)
- 1:15 PM: Check-in Chaos. The front desk lady, bless her heart, looked like she'd seen some things. Maybe she'd worked the graveyard shift at the local Whataburger. Either way, she was sweet. The computer, however, was not. Took an agonizingly long time to check me in. I caught myself thinking about the meaning of life while I waited. Is it the perfect omelet? The perfect sunset? My complimentary breakfast sausage tomorrow?
- 1:45 PM: Room Reconnaissance. Okay, the room. Standard. Clean. The TV works. The bed… it looks inviting. Thank the Lord. I'm a champion of a good bed. The A/C is blasting, which is essential, because, you know, Texas.
- 2:00 PM: The Laundry Lament. Okay, confession time. I’m doing laundry. At the Holiday Inn laundromat. Don't judge me! Life on the road, man. Throwing in a load of whites and then I’m thinking – why am I so behind on life? Should I get that job at the place I'm thinking of applying? Does it have a good 401k? Oh, God.
- 2:30 PM: Unpacking and Staring into the Void (aka, the TV). Okay, laundry is going. Now I’m just… staring. At the TV. Channel surfing. Found a rerun of a cowboy movie. I’m thinking about my life. Probably shouldn’t be thinking.
- 4:00 PM: The Pampa Promenade (aka, a Quick Trip to Walmart). Gotta get some snacks. Gotta. Walmart is… well, it's Walmart. A kaleidoscope of humanity. I see things I can't even begin to describe. Grab some chips, some water, and maybe a candy bar. I tell myself it's for research. (It's not.)
- 5:30 PM: Dinner at the Local Eatery (TBD). Gotta find a restaurant. I’m going to be honest. I’m scared. I’m picturing a giant steak and a whole lotta friendliness. I'm not sure I’m ready.
- 7:00 PM: Back to the Room, Bed, and Existential Dread. Okay, if I survive dinner (and the inevitable overeating), it’ll be time to wallow in the delightful comfort of my king-sized, beige bed. Maybe watch some more bad TV. Maybe journal. Maybe cry a little. Who knows? It's the Pampa experience, after all!
(Anecdote: I once drove through a town in Kansas that was so silent, I swear I heard the tumbleweeds whispering my name. This might be worse.)
Day 2: Breakfast, Local Flavors, and Unexpected Revelations
- 7:00 AM: The Free Breakfast Battle (aka, the Sausage Saga). Okay, the free breakfast. Expectations… tempered. The continental breakfast. The usual suspects – scrambled eggs (potentially powdered), sausage (potentially questionable provenance), and the ever-present waffle maker. My goal? Survive. And maybe sneak a second sausage. Don't judge me!
- 8:00 AM: The Grand Tour (of Pampa, TX, Baby!). Time to explore. I’m aiming for… I don’t know. The historical museum? The Claude E. "Buck" Taylor Memorial? Something. I'm genuinely curious. I hope I can find some good memories for a memoir I will probably never write.
- 11:00 AM: Lunch at… (TBD, Again!). More food. Gotta fuel the adventure, right? I'm open to suggestions. Preferably something with air conditioning.
- 1:00 PM: The Most Important Category: Time to write. I will write some of my thoughts on what I've seen here. I need to process all of this.
- 3:00 PM: Poolside Contemplation (If There Is One). Let's be honest, I'm half hoping the hotel has a pool. If it does, I plan to sit by it, read a book, and think about… well, everything. If there isn't one, I'll stare longingly out the window and imagine one.
- 5:00 PM: Dinner and… the Big Question. Dinner. Decision-making. I'm going to try something new and different tonight. Maybe the BBQ joint everyone raves about? Maybe, and this is a big maybe, I'll try to be friendly.
- 7:00 PM: More TV. More Bed. More Meaning of Life. I'm going to turn into a vegetable, aren't I?
(Quirky Observation: Everyone in Pampa seems to drive trucks. Big trucks. I feel like I'm in a commercial.)
Day 3: Departure & Last-Minute Reflections
- 7:00 AM: Another Free Breakfast Conquest. Another day. Another sausage. Preparing myself for another day of life.
- 8:00 AM: Packing & Prep & Panic! Okay, time to pack. Saying goodbye to my beige haven. Was it good? Was it bad? It was.
- 9:00 AM: Final Walk-Through & Check-Out. One last look at the room. Make sure I haven't left anything important (like my sanity). Check out. Say goodbye to the wonderful woman at the front desk.
- 9:30 AM: The Pampa Send-Off: A Gas Station Snack. I head for the highway. The gas station. The obligatory bag of chips and a diet coke.
- 10:00 AM: Leaving Pampa. Leaving this place! Did it change me? Probably. Did I find enlightenment? Maybe a little, or maybe a whole lot.
- [Time unspecified but throughout the entire trip]: Existential Crisis (Ongoing).
(Emotional Reaction: I feel… well, I feel a lot. Mostly, I feel profoundly grateful for the small things – a clean bed, a working AC, and a good sausage.)
(Rambling Aside: Travel is weird, isn't it? We chase experiences, searching for something. But sometimes, the best experiences are the unexpected ones. The beige ones. The ones that remind you that you're alive, and a little bit broken, and that's okay.)
This itinerary is, as I said, messy. Imperfect. But it's mine. And hopefully, it offers a glimpse into an adventure that's uniquely… human.
Escape to Grande Prairie: Your Dream Holiday Inn & Suites Awaits!
Pampa's BEST Hotel?! Holiday Inn Express Review (You Won't Believe This!)
So, is the Holiday Inn Express in Pampa REALLY the “BEST”? Like, even remotely?
Okay, let’s get this out of the way: "BEST" is a *strong* word. Let's just say... it's the least worst option I could find in Pampa. And honestly, after driving for six hours with a screaming toddler and a caffeine withdrawal headache, "least worst" started to look like luxury. But "BEST"? I think you're aiming a bit high there, website reviewers.
Don't get me wrong – the place *functions*. It has a roof, a bed (mostly), and... well, let's just say it *attempts* to have breakfast.
Let's talk about that breakfast, then... because I've seen some *things* in hotel breakfast buffets.
Oh, the dreaded breakfast. Okay, so picture this: a sad little waffle maker sputtering weakly, a mountain of pre-packaged pastries that looked like they’d been in a museum for the last fifty years, and... the *coffee*. Oh, the coffee. It tasted like dishwater that someone *thought* about brewing coffee with. I swear, I’ve had stronger brews in a gas station bathroom… and that’s saying something. My god, the coffee. I'm still having nightmares.
But hey, they had some questionable (and I mean *questionable*) scrambled eggs that might have been made from a dehydrated egg powder. Bless their hearts, they tried.
Pro Tip: Bring your own coffee. Seriously. And maybe a snack. Or twenty.
The Rooms: Were they clean? And did they have… bedbugs? (I'm asking the important questions.)
Okay, deep breath. No bedbugs (that I saw, at least!). And yes, the room was... clean-ish. I mean, the sheets seemed fresh, the bathroom didn't look like a biohazard zone, and that's about all you can reasonably ask for when traveling the vast expanse of west Texas at 2 AM.
The decor, however, was a masterclass in beige. Beige walls, beige carpet, beige curtains… it was like living inside a giant, fluffy, beige marshmallow. Okay, maybe it was a little *TOO* beige. After a while, everything blurred together, and I swear I started seeing in shades of… well, you get the picture.
My heart did flutter, however, the moment I saw the remote was wrapped in plastic. It was pristine! Almost as if it didn't have dozens of grubby hands on it.
Was the Staff at least… not horrible? Because let's face it, good staff can make or break a place.
Okay, credit where credit's due. The staff – bless their hearts – were genuinely trying. They were polite, helpful, and didn't seem to actively dislike me, which, after the coffee incident, was a major victory. I even had a lovely chat with the gentleman at the front desk about the weather (always a solid conversation starter in Texas). He wasn't exactly jumping up and down with enthusiasm, but he helped me get the wifi password, at the very least. Small victories.
I requested extra towels and they were delivered posthaste. That's a big win in my book.
The Pool? Did it even *have* a pool? And if so, was it… you know… swimmable?
Yes, it had a pool! Honestly, after the drive, the uninspired coffee, and the beige room, I was *dying* for a swim. And this is where things get interesting. The pool, a shimmering oasis of blue (that was slightly cloudy, mind you), sat right off the lobby! After you go in, and get the chlorine out of your eyes, it was nice!
It was a little chilly, but I chalked that up to the Texas weather. Definitely better than the rest of my day.
Ok. Anything else? Any little details that made you either love or hate the place?
Okay, here's a random, slightly embarrassing story. I somehow managed to lock myself out of my room at 11 PM. Picture me, pajama-clad, hair a mess, standing in the hallway looking like I’d just lost my best friend. The staff member, bless his soul, was wonderfully patient, even when I almost lost it on him. I needed that key card so badly.
Also, the elevator rattled a bit, which might or might not have added to the general feeling of "things might spontaneously fall apart." But hey, it worked!
So, would you stay there again? Really. Be honest.
Look, if I *had* to be in Pampa again, and there were no other options (and trust me, sometimes there AREN'T, trust me), I'd probably end up back at the Holiday Inn Express. It's… adequate. It’s not a destination, but it'll get you through the night.
Just... bring your own coffee. And maybe some earplugs (for the elevator). And lower your expectations. A lot. Then you'll probably be alright.

